Letting go of a friendship is never easy. You might have shared some great memories, inside jokes, and more with this person. They can be some of the most rewarding relationships in our lives, or they can be some of the most toxic. Many times, we find ourselves in relationships that we know aren’t good for us, but we hold on to them because it’s hard to let go
Perhaps the thought of letting go of a friend causes you to become scared of being alone, fear of starting over, or we don’t want to hurt the other person’s feelings. In this blog post, we will discuss signs that it’s time to let go of a friendship. If you’re experiencing any of these signs, it might be time to move on.
Tell-Tale Signs You’re Outgrowing Your Friends
1. They’re not really happy for you when it comes to major life milestones
When you’re celebrating some of life’s most beautiful moments and the person you expected to step up to support and cheer you on isn’t being the most genuine in their congratulations, it might sting a little.
If they don’t share in your enthusiasm or feel happy for you when good things happen, it might be a sign that they’re not really rooting for your success. This can be one of the most hurtful things to experience in friendships because it feels like a betrayal.
Leaving friendships behind like the one described can be really tough, but if it’s not serving you anymore, it might be time to move on from friends that don’t want to see you win.
2. You don’t have anything in common with them anymore
If you find that your interests and hobbies no longer align with those of your friends, it can create a disconnect in the relationship. It’s totally normal for people to grow and change over time, but if you feel like you’re on two different paths in life, it might be difficult to maintain the friendship.
It’s not uncommon for friendships to come and go as we move through different stages in our lives. What comes first is your happiness and if this friend doesn’t make you happy, walking away from someone who doesn’t value you is always an option
3. They conduct your relationship like a money transaction
Sounds familiar to you? If a friend is using you only to gain something out of the relationship that places them in a better position, it might be time to let them go. This could look like a friend who never ceases to take advantage of you by doing things to get them ahead while you always end up feeling used.
It’s not a healthy friendship if someone is only in it for what they can get out of it. These types of friends are often called “fair-weather friends” because they’re only there when things are good and bail as soon as things get tough. If this sounds like someone you know, it’s absolutely okay to distance yourself from friends that treat you like this.
4. Your conversations are mostly negative
Ever talked to a friend over the phone and 5 seconds into the conversation you realize that you’re conversation is similar to the last one you had?
When you sit down to catch up with a friend and the conversation quickly turns into a venting session about work, school, family, or other stressors in life, it’s probably not the most healthy friendship. We all need someone to let off some steam with from time to time, but if this is a regular occurrence, it might be an indicator that you’ve outgrown this friendship.
5. You have a selfish friend
Simply put, a selfish friend is someone who only cares about themselves. If your friendship consists of them always talking about themselves, their problems, and their accomplishments and they never ask about you, it might be one-sided.
In a healthy friendship, both parties should feel like they’re being heard and supported. If you feel like you’re always the one giving and never receiving, ask yourself if they are actually your best friend.
6. You’re really not friends anymore
Have you ignored the signs you’ve outgrown your friend but overanalyzing everything and you’re still not sure if it’s time to let go? It’s hard to come to terms that they are no longer your best friend but growing out of friendships is a natural part of life.
Sometimes, the easiest way to know if it’s time to move on is by listening to your gut. If you really don’t feel like this person is your friend anymore and the relationship doesn’t make you happy, it’s okay to admit you outgrew that friendship.
7. In your heart of hearts, you know your friend doesn’t care about you
One of the clear signs your friend doesn’t care about you is if you constantly feel like they’re judging you. If your friend says one thing but hurts you by the way they treat you, it’s time to do some serious self-reflection.
If you feel like your friend is always putting you down, making fun of you, not being supportive, excluding you from events, or being a disloyal friend, it might be a sign that they don’t care about you. These are all examples of how someone might let their actions speak louder than their words.
Signs your friendship is growing apart
We outgrow friendships for all sorts of reasons. If you’re no longer friends with someone you used to be close with, it’s probably because one of the aforementioned signs applied to your friendship.
When you’re growing and changing, it’s only natural for some of your friendships to change as well. Coming to terms that a friendship that has run its course can be difficult, but it’s important to remember that not everyone that grows with you can go with you.